Heavy on my mind

I don't know what to write. I've thought for a long time that it was because I had run out of things to say, things that inspired me, or that I cared about. But that's not the case. The truth is that there is so much to say that I am buried beneath it all. I don't know where to begin. The thing that is on the forefront of my thoughts is beyond explanation. I don't know how to write it. I can't speak of it. I can hardly begin to touch the thought before I am overwhelmed, and then its gone, buried somewhere I've forgotten how to access. The sad thing about it all is that if I knew what do do about it, how to make it better, I'm not sure I would. The locked away thing has become a part of me. One so heavy I dare not try to cast it away, lest I leave myself more broken by the exertion of the act than I am by bearing it longer. Thus the dilemma. The longer I bear it, the more broken I shall be over time.